Monday, October 24, 2005

Job Hunting

"is seeking an experienced, efficient, reliable pizza guru for evening / delivery shifts." ... Pizza. Guru.

"The offer is currently part time and will be built into a full-time position with interesting compensation" ... like, say, sacrifices to the Great Old Ones....

"I have 18 years of Gardening experience, and I am certified in Horticulture.
My company provides weekly lawn and Garden Maintenance,and Garden design, within the Colwood/ Metchosin area." ... It's BC. Most people are certified in "horticulture",, or know someone who is. Unless, of course, they meant something other than recreational drugs.

"Job Title: PT Packager Primary Skills: Hard working" "Be able to pass Manpower assessment testing Be able to pass drug screen Be fluent in English" ... be able to write periods. Just because you can. I wonder at the drug screening, though.

"Seeking Restaurant Personalle with an enthusiastic, outgoing personality for 24 hr family restaurant. Applicants must be team players, able to work shifts. The ability to clean as they go a must. Applicants 19 yrs old with food safe given priorty." ... no comment.

ESSENTIAL SKILL LIST
{essential Skills:(Select all that apply)
Reading textDocument use
NumeracyWriting
Oral communicationWorking with others
Problem solvingDecision making
Critical thinkingJob task planning and organizing
Significant use of memoryFinding information
Computer useContinuous learning

... So, who does NOT have any of these? Explaining Insignificant use of memory would be amusing, at least.

"Other Information: Listen! You have to want to be around the crazy world of baking. It's about PASSION mixed with a desire to learn, integrity, flexibility. Sometimes it's tedious, often it is pressured but it should always be fun! If you have FOODSAFE, a sense of humour and want to learn, send us your resume." .... that rocks :) Applying becauuse a) it's fun and b) that was awesomely honest.

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