If fimbulwinter is
what precedes Ragnarok then perhaps more greenhouses gasses are a
good thing?
“Only small
people fear small things.”
Once upon a time,
someone told me that madness was doing the same thing over and over,
but now I know that isn’t true: madness is doing what you know you
shouldn’t do and being desperate enough to do it anyway.
“I found
something I shouldn’t have.”
“That is the
start of many great stories. And tragedies too, I imagine.” Kes
chuckled, the sound soft and bubbly.
“I think you trust autocorrect more
than you trust me.”
You are my control, my alt, even my
delete key.
Some days the
parking lot cried over how empty it was at night. No one noticed,
even if there were more cracks in the asphalt to be fixed than the
city had budgeted for.
Joe replaced his personality with a
series of tattoos.
Reasons I could
never be vegan: having to tell everyone I meet that I was a vegan
would take up too much time.
“I’m sorry,
but we can’t hire you. You only have 1 star reviews on AmazonLife.”
He started the
interview process for all potential hires by introducing them to his
assistant, a red sockpuppet named Sparkie that conducted the first
half of the interview.
They said it was
cultural appropriation when the older generation began to mimic their
slang in a post-emoji world.
You asked how I
survived, but I was wearing armour rather than armor, and the extra
letter was all the kevlar I needed.
“They say that X
marks the spot but won’t tell you Y.”
I kept trying to
find a way to tell you, unable to finds words in our own tongue. No
matter that our tongues were not strangers, that we were often so
close as to be one. But I had deleted your Twitter account by
accident, and could not bring myself to share so deep a truth.
So I understand, I
think, why you never told me about your affair.
“I
have to hide my poetry in prose, or they will never take me seriously
at all!”
“You’re
writing a technical manual on how to use a digital camera. You can’t
expect to win a Pulitzer with that, not even if you hide an epic poem
in it.”
“You
never know. You never know. I’d settle for the Carnegie Medal.”
I
opened the door of my closet a crack, just to see if you were waiting
on the other side.
“When
we said that the community was going to be mixed-use, we meant that
poor people were not going to be part of that mix.”
“I
was tired of never getting caught,” was all the bank robber said in
his interview despite the press demanding to know how he had been
given a four million dollar golden handshake despite seeing the banks
profits plunge by 45% during his tenure as CEO.
I filled the silence with pregnant
pauses and dangling ellipses
“I think I am in love with just how
much I hate you.”
“Yes, I do know you can, ah,
transform into bacon, ham, and sausage, but I am afraid that it is
NOT a superpower, Mr. Pig”
“Ah, the teapot you gave me has no
handles on it. I was wondering why?”
“Didn’t you read the script on on
the bottom?”
“No, I –.Truth? You named a
teapot?”
“You can’t handle the truth!”
“… I think I
am about to throw it at your head.”
Sometimes life
just throws the most awful sucker-punches right at us. And the only
thing we can do is find a way to get back up, even if sometimes we
don't see why we spend the effort...
If you could be
one button on a microwave, which button would you be?
I don’t know love could be counterfeited until I met you.
Did you know that nothing is ever counterfeited because! you can’t
fake something without knowing the true thing too :D
Proposed yoga
pose: frowning cactus.
“Will you be my frenemy?”
“That’s not how most people ask
someone out for a date.”
“I’m just
trying to be honest about how it may end.”
Clinging to fading
glories as though they were morning ones, we plant seeds in the
ground as if a garden might sprout. We talk about wonders with voices
choked raw with nostalgia and we forget our great dream was another’s
nightmare, or how many steps backward we took for every one we
staggered forward. We keep pretending we have so much to offer as
though the future ever needed us at all.
Imagine if your
life was really divided into chapters. All the ways in which you’d
dread the cliffhangers.
“I am so scared
of how much I need you.”
“You’ve never
said that to me before.”
“Sorry. I was
talking to my frappuccino.”
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